That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
