she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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