You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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