Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
