Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Randomize
