so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
We need to get me chipped asap
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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