i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Randomize
