what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize