This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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