when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
