She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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