Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize
