Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
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i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
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The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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