I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
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