who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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