good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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