yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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