the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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