all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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