Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
