dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize