So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
