I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
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