Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
