You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
