doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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