I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Randomize
