My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
