Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize