Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
