yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
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First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
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3 2 1 whiskey
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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