don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Found your dick twin last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
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