I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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