I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
