I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize