How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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