Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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