Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
