i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
