flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does it feel to date your dad?
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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