so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
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She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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