i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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