she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
As shirtless as possible
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
