too bad you live with your parents still
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize