He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I had to cum in my sink.
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