well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
