you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Randomize
