YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
