Buhtt sex?
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
