ADVERTISEMENT

• (248): View more from Michigan

  so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?

  (248): View more from Michigan

  oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.

  Fav 2 1010 1428

  share tweet
  

• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Did you hit it?

  (616): View more from Michigan

  Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.

  Fav 10 1385 2433

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (480): View more from Arizona

  turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.

  Fav 30 5233 1124

  share tweet
  

• (650): View more from California

  We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign

  (562): View more from California

  You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo

  Fav 68 6008 1300

  share tweet
  
• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (443): View more from Maryland

  he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber

  Fav 20 1976 5201

  share tweet
  

• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.

  Fav 21 1084 5999

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (337): View more from Louisiana

  When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.

  Fav 1 729 1096

  share tweet
  

• (574): View more from Indiana

  No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you

  Fav 3 708 1348

  share tweet
  

• (505): View more from New Mexico

  I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence

  (1-505): View more from New Mexico

  That sucks

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!

  Fav 2 907 538

  share tweet
  
• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (956): View more from Texas

  I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.

  Fav 0 500 629

  share tweet
  

• (503): View more from Oregon

  i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy

  Fav 4 879 528

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (704): View more from North Carolina

  I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."

  (1-704): View more from North Carolina

  was his pinky out?

  Fav 1 734 400

  share tweet
  

• (319): View more from Iowa

  I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.

  Fav 1 708 302

  share tweet
  

• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL

  Fav 1 283 158

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (207): View more from Maine

  Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?

  Fav 5 120 7

  share tweet
  

Randomize