are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
